Healthy Living Challenge: Day 27 – New Weight Plateau

Yeap, I reached another one and this one is not budging. 68.4 for the last week and a half. It hasn’t helped that the weather has been darn cold and I wasn’t able to go out anywhere. Have you experienced plateaux when trying to lose weight? What were the solutions that worked for you? I am half way there with my weight loss but it would be nice to kick start my metabolism again and be 65 kilos by the time I hit the beach. Please help!

This is a frustrating day 27, only 13 days of this healthy living challenge!

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I was actually 63.5 in this one but it’s just about how I aim to look this summer!

Healthy Living Challenge: Day 18 – Car crash and pizza

This was an eventful day I am glad to see the back of.

After work I drove into an industrial estate in Belfast to pick a DHL package (with more healthy goodies!!) but on the way out got crashed into. I had Emma in the car on the side that was hit but thankfully she was sleeping and  never became aware of it even. It was a minor crash and no-one was injured but my passenger door is jammed now and opens with a painful crack and my bumper is askew. Bummer!

So no healthy dinners tonight, hubby took us out for pizza at Pizza Express. I had their light version, Legerra with Pollo because it had only 500 calories but found it heavy after almost 3 weeks of eating only healthy food.

This is day 18, there are 22 days left of this healthy living challenge and I hope tomorrow everybody who drives by will stick to their side of the road :-)

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Damned if you do, damned if you don’t

Bless you, Eleanor Roosevelt, I couldn’t have said it better! As a mum who needs to make constant choices towards my three year old’s happiness, safety, contentment, education, entertainment, nutrition, I constantly feel EXACTLY like that.

The latest example is my choice to do a little part-time, temporary job in the afternoon, looking after two other children. I thought it would be ideal for us, as a mama and daughter team, as Emma could come along so she wouldn’t be separated from me. I would earn some cash, she would earn new friends, winners all around, right? Aaaaaah, nope!

Monday was bad but bearable. I saw it coming from the moment I picked her up from playgroup. “I want crackers and cheese!” was screamed at me as soon as she got into the car. Naturally, as the afternoon progressed, so did her moods escalate. But they were manageable.

Yesterday was bad. She didn’t get to nap, played hard in Funky Monkeys so by the end of the afternoon when I left the kids’ house I was feeling sorry for them. And for myself. She napped in the car so I foolishly assumed I was out of the woods. Oh, no…she had kept her best for a last performance. Think banged doors, flung around toys, screaming, nonsensical demands, whining, tears and more whining.  More than I can bear whining. And you know what? She keeps all this “special treatment” for me. As soon as daddy got home she plastered a smile on her not-so-long-ago-scrunched-up-face and said sweetly: “Daddy, let’s play!”

So my conclusion is: no matter what you do as a mum, your kids will never be happy with your choices because kids are primarily concerned with their own comfort and little else. And once you make a choice, you need to learn to live with it and your kid’s almost certain disapproval. Probably find compromises that would make all involved if not happy at least comfortable.

Last weekend I attended a writing course with Mumsnet and the conversation led to the very same subject. I was shocked to hear that women dealt with the same dilemma even 15 years after they had had kids. How disabling had felt for them to face the reality of having a child in a busy man’s world and how restrictive their career choices had felt afterwards. How torn they feel between doing things that fulfil them professionally and keeping the peace in the house. How the expectations to be there for their kids are always placed on them as mums and rarely on their partners. How even women who in the world’s eyes are professionally accomplished and had achieved the perfect family-work balance by either working from home, working less than they could or giving up work completely felt actually that they had failed someone. Either one of their kids, themselves, their spouse…

I couldn’t bother taking her to playgroup today. The very thought of dragging her out of bed, putting up with her whining over her choice of pants and which toy to bring along in the car made me choose the least stressful option. But I am sure there will be some discontentment along the way. I will just have to live with it, I suppose and wait for the waters to settle again…Keep-calm-and-carry-on-scan

Greece: a country of dichotomies

For almost three months while we were in Greece I kept thinking: “I need to write a post on Greece as a dichotomy country, as I have seen it as a resident, not a mere visitor.”  I never got around to do it. We’re living in two hours for Ireland so this is my last chance.

Why dichotomy country? Because there is such a massive difference between the public and the private property. Because there is such a contrast between what people tell you about their salaries being cut and the abundance they still live in. Such a gap between the blessings that God has poured upon this country and the negative attitude and talk you hear everywhere. Let me give you some examples of what shocked, amazed and saddened us for 90 days or so.

1. The private and the public.

The Greeks are so very proud of their apartment buildings, their houses and their gardens, especially those who live in  the North. Extreme care is giving to keeping an aesthetic appearance through micro-irrigation systems, lawn and building maintenance. We have travelled a lot in Europe so I can say without goofing that the average apartment building in Greece exceeds by far the quality and square meters of even those in Switzerland. The public, on the other hand, is at the other extreme pole. Roads are unkempt and pure dangerous many times. The bins are rarely collected on time due to councils’ lack of funds and subsequent bin men strikes. Compost is literally dumped on the road from the very tidy private gardens of the illustrious Greek citizens.

The Greeks adopt the same attitude when it comes to dealing with people. If it’s on their private territory they go out of their way to make you feel welcomed. They overfeed you and treat you like royalty. They are the best of friends and the kindest neighbours. If they deal with you on public territory you’re…well…unlucky. They are rude and grossly inefficient when in public positions(I came to believe their standard response to ANY query is NO, before they even listen to your request). They honk, beep and curse when driving, to the slightest mistake you make. They are impatient in buses, on the road, in the market(even if you’re pushing a pram). As I said, unlucky.

2. Poverty and waste

I felt for the elderly in Greece. They are the ones who have felt the blow the hardest when the government decided to cut down salaries and pensions. We know there are many people who won’t be able to heat their homes this winter because heating oil has become way too expensive. I felt for the young families where one or both of the parents have lost their jobs and they had been forced to move in with their parents. I cried when one day a young woman in the market approached us(and everybody else passing by) asking for help as they were being evicted from their rental accommodation. It broke my heart to see she was carrying a young child who was too ashamed to look people in the eye and had her head burrowed in her mum’s shoulder. It left me shaken because I know how proud Greek people are and I knew this young woman had reached the bottom.

But I was shocked time and again when we went out and saw people leaving heaps of food on the table at the end of a meal. People buying six to eight 10-kilo detergent boxes at the time just because the supermarket had a deal they couldn’t resist. How their sweet shops and bakeries(ARTos, very appropriately called) are amazing artistry display shows and how much of their produce goes in the bin at the end of the day. Looking at the tempting sweet shop window displays, noticing that the only businesses doing well in Greece at the moment are the food shops I had the strong feeling Greek invest their money in the immediate pleasure, not in the everlasting. In palatable goods and not in feeling good about helping each other and their country to progress.

3. Rich country and poor attitudes

Which brings me to the general attitude of poverty of attitude. As I said, we never stepped into a public office without being given the standard “no” first. Even when doing simple tickets like buying bus tickets we were asked to go back(a mere 30-minute drive) the following day because there was NO way they could release tickets from the day before. When asked why the public service workers just stare. If it hasn’t been done before, they won’t initiate the change, even if it’s as simple as releasing a ticket. The Greeks seem to have lost never had a sense of civilization as in ” the social process whereby societies achieve an advanced stage of development and organization.” From early days they have labelled themselves as democrats; democracy as in “a form of government in which the supreme power is vested in the people and exercised directly by them.” I found functionaries in Greece unwilling to want to help their country attain that advanced stage of organisation because they are only interested in exercising supreme power over the poor people they were appointed to serve.

On the upper hand, Greece is a blessed country. With wonderful scenery, glorious weather and beautiful fresh produce. These alone should suffice(and has for us) to make one grateful and happy to have lived here. Greece has wriggled its way into my heart. I fell in love with it when I was 17 and I came here camping with YWAM. I fantasised in it as an Erasmus student and now I love it with a mature love of understanding and acceptance. I am sorely sorry we have to leave it for a season but I know we will return sooner than later. Because we love it and we can’t be away from it for too long.

Things coming together

I am happy.The happiest I have been in ages. Our lives have taken shape again.

After a very turbulent year during which we lost a house, a business and felt our life shaken to the core in its most significant areas(our relationship with each other, our sense of belonging and security) we have finally found PEACE and CONTENTMENT.

We have learned many precious lessons through all the difficult months:

1. A bigger house doesn’t necessarily equal a happier wife/life. For me, a bigger house by the beach(everyone’s dream, right?) meant being away from friends, from work, from life!

2. When God takes away from you the things that made you feel secure(for my hubby, a prosperous business, for myself, my home) it’s not because He wants to punish you. It’s because He needs to remove the obstacles that prevent you from seeking Him and His ways.

3. Working with your hubby doesn’t work!!For me, anyway. I have learned that it’s better to face my our personal challenges ALONE because solving them gives me a sense of worth I would never achieve by having hubby “protecting” me from the big, bad world…

4. Changes bring along good things! We have made a lot of new friends and have reconnected with good old friends  in Thessaloniki. We are excited to have met so many quality people in such a short space of time and we truly hope these friendships will develop in time as Thessaloniki will be the place we’ll be returning to for holidays and short breaks. We have an apartment here now that we want to put to good use, at the end of the day!!

5. Agreement is most important when married! As you have probably gathered from my previous post, we are both quite strong headed and determined to have OUR own way. But stripped to the bare bone and left without the things that defined us as the selfish ME we have learned to listen more to each other and work towards a common goal.

6. Losing gives one the opportunity to rethink/restructure one’s life in order to achieve happiness. When we lost our home we were given the chance to explore options as we wouldn’t have done before. I knew hubby was missing his home land. He knew I wanted him to readjust his focus from business to family. We were trapped into a false sense of security and a rut, a fruitless busyness we needed to escape. And we did! Relocating to Greece for three months gave hubby the opportunity to realise he wants his home country to be a summer and not a permanent location for the moment. It gave us the chance to spend time in the presence of  dear friends for whom family comes first and who helped us put things into perspective and re-shift our focus. And it made us realise we want to work now that we are young in a country like Ireland, where conditions are favourable so that we can enjoy our old age in a country like Greece, where the sun is predominant :-) .  Things have come together for us and I couldn’t be happier!

Life is better when surrounded by friends.

Back from holidays

At least, for a while :-) . It’s been a great summer and because I have been too busy enjoying myself promises have been broken(what, PostADay?, yeah, I know,I screwed up!) and Alexa numbers have dropped. Oh well, not to worry, I have the whole winter to make it up to myself, to Alexa and to PostADay.

What have we been up to in the last three weeks?

1. Had another set of family visiting. Brothers in law, to be more exact. Precise on diets but not very good with keeping the time…yeah, I prefer girls, thanks!

2. Spent time with a friend who goes way back to my student days. Reverted to the careless, silly and giggly girls from back then for a whole of two weeks, can you imagine???

3. Visited more of Greece and loved every minute of it! Greece is gorgeous and I am glad I married a Greek man so O have a lifetime to discover it!

4. ATE!!A lot of good food. Became almost a connoisseur. Which is good when you’re in places like Thessaloniki, where they know how to cook(I can give you an extensive list of places to eat and sweets to try :-) . And bad when you’re heading back to places where Indian is the local speciality.

5. Spent a lot of time outside with Emma. Walks and open markets. Evening swims.

6. Tried to fill my batteries with good memories as we prepare to head back to Ireland at the beginning of October.

Right, enjoy my gallery and talk soon!

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Mama’s Visit

Okay, I have been lazy and haven’t posted for while but it was all for a good reason. We had mum visiting with us for almost two weeks and our mission has been to make sure mum had the time of her life.

We took Mum to visit places of interest to her: a day trip to mount Athos and visits to Thessaloniki’s old catacombs.

We encouraged her to try new things: gyros(a much yummier version of kebab!), wonderful home made sweets from as many zaxaroplastias(Greek sweet shops) we could and a swim in the sea had been on our to-do-list!

Most importantly, we allowed her to spend time with her granddaughter and re-acquaint with Emma as a little girl full of stories, opinions and love for her Bica.

Mum left today and we feel our  mission has been achieved in its most important task: Emma begged her till the last moment to stay with us as there is room for her here! There were tears and sadness but more important, there were memories created that will stay with us and soothe us till it’s time to meet again. Yes, life is a continuous series of hellos and goodbyes but as long as we have precious moments to hang on the wait to the next reunion is not that sour…

But we wish you could stay here with us mum, there is room for you here…

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Waiting for my mummy

Mum visiting us in Belfast,Christmas 2009

As we speak, my mummy should be arriving in Thessaloniki;she  is visiting us for a few weeks. Her love gave her strength to face a 17-hour bus trip and come and see us.

I can’t wait to spend time with her. To take her to the beach and show her how well Emma can swim. To take her to laiki(open market) and do the shopping together. To take her with us(Emma and I while hubby is working) and spend the day in Ikea looking for bargains. To spend the evenings together watching Greek T.V. To witness her experience yet another culture and take joy in it.

I love my mum. She has been my pillar and my strength since I can remember. And I am happy she’s healthy and well and we’ll be able to enjoy Greece together for a few days. Kalinixta everybody!!

 

Visiting grandparents and routine chaos

We made it safe to Patra to my in-laws. The seven-hour journey went better than expected as Emma fell asleep at her usual time and woke up only for half an hour when we arrived in my in-laws house around 1 a.m. What really didn’t go well(and it never goes well, every time we have visited them in the summer) was the afternoon nap. It must be the heat or the excitement of seeing them or the change or…but Emma goes from perfect sleeper to crazy sleep-deprived maniac when we come over.  I have been wrecked after a cold and two nights of going to bed at 2 a.m. and have been soo looking forward to having a siesta today,especially since the temperatures soared to 40 Celsius. No such luck for me but…I tried EVERYTHING to coax her into sleeping  and so did her dad, from speaking softly to making threats to leaving her in her room for 10 minutes to cry it off to pretending we were both asleep to taking her into our bed to… Nothing worked and it made me realise what a strong willed child I have. She is the sweetest kid but when she falls off the sleep wagon she goes it with gusto. I got a glimpse of what she’s going to be as an adult: determined, fearless, undefeated. I love all these traits in her and I know they will make her go far in life but when it bring us head to head it’s less pleasant…

Anyway, she did a full shift today from 8 a.m., had a meltdown at the beach after she swam with Papou for undetermined reasons and finally clocked in unsolicited(almost) at 10.30 p.m.

We are taking off for our couple break in the morning so all I can hope is that she is going to fall into rhythm again for her Giagia and Theia who will be looking after her. Next post will be from Zante/Zakynthos. Talk to you tomorrow, have a lovely rest everyone, I know I sure will!!

One of my favourite pictures of Emma form when she was a baby.

 

 

 

 

Moving on

Okay, one more week and we’ll be leaving this house. Although located in an ideal location and an enviable neighbourhood,  it proved to be more an in-between station for me and less of a home.We knew we were going to move on eventually and I never managed to accept it as more than what it was, a temporary stop.

I also found the transition from having our own home to renting especially tough since I come from a family that never rented. It’s a Romanian thing, a legacy from the Communist times when everybody had to have a job and an apartment they would have usually payed during their working years. That goes to show you that ideas we were raised with and that were drummed into us as children stay with us for a lifetime and influence our happiness.

It’s been some very interesting eight months with loads of ups and downs and many epiphanies. We lost what we both held dearest on the day we moved: my home and hubby’s successful business. We moaned and mourned together but not before we stripped down our relationship of all civility(at times) and nonsense. We made up in a state of nakedness of spirit because there was nothing to hide behind anymore. And we  discussed repeatedly and in depth about where we should be moving next. It was a lengthy and tedious process because we had to consider not only our own preferences but each other’s and Emma’s. Finances. Economical and political circumstances. Churches we could integrate into and places where we BOTH had memories, connections, family, friends. Places where we could shape a future for Emma and for ourselves.

Anyway, it’s time I packed once again. Here is what I learned from moving four times in the last ten years:

1. Start early and stay organised. Don’t leave anything for the week before you move. We did it once and we ended up with things thrown in black bags because there was no time to pack into boxes.

2. Throw away what you don’t use/don’t need anymore! Had to do this for my mum and dad when they moved as I found things from when we were babies. They kept them “just in case we’ll need them again.” Seriously, baby clothes?!?

3. Keep what has sentimental value or you have paid a lot of money for. I have kept some of Emma’s baby clothes and shoes and the toys I paid a lot for. Just in case I’ll have another wee one…

4. We have found that packing into clear boxes keep everything tidy and easy to find when you unpack. Keep everything into room boxes, clearly labeled so that if you use a removal company the boxes end up in the right room.

5. Use a removal company!!It’s £50/hour but if you’re organised they’re finished in a few hours and your house is ready to move in almost instantly.

6. Wrap up your kitchen things in bubble wrap or similar material. Pack tightly so nothing moves during the move and gets broken.

7. Keep packaging when you buy T.V.s, kids’ toys, printers…etc. It’s easier and safer to move loose or big items in their initial packaging than in random boxes.

8. Recruit help if have a lot of stuff or are not particularly organised.

9. Be mindful of things you use till the last moment(bed linen, cutlery and toiletries); they account for last minute delays and frustration. Leave room in your car for them(if you move near) or an extra box(if you move far from your last location).

10. If you hate the process, just remember, it will all pass, just like anything else :-)

I will share some of my “packing” photos, just to show you what I mean.

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