Since my last post I had a lot of responses from dear friends regarding my current situation.
Friends who love God encouraged me to persevere through it all and wait for His perfect timing and solutions. Friends who don’t or have forgotten what it means to love Him encouraged me to believe in myself, send good vibes and carry on.
But the best response was from Him(no offence, everybody!). On Sunday morning, during worship time ( if you’re not a Christian or haven’t been in a liberal church before, that’s the time we bellow out to Him, some more aptly than others, trying to forget our pressing situations and focus on His greatness) He spoke to me through an image. A warrior woman, hitting her shield with her sword: “Boom! Boom! Boom!” I could almost hear it. And then came the words: “I haven’t forgotten you. I have been preparing you for war. Worked on you, strengthened you so you can go and attack the enemy’s camp. The warrior you saw? You know what’s she’s doing? Provoking the enemy to fight. No cowering , nor fear any more. Taking back what belongs to Me.”
Last night, I woke up around 2.30 with a feverish child who needed comforting. And Paracetamol. Took her an hour to get comfortable enough to go back to sleep. Then it took me another one to fall asleep myself. Hardly the condition for vivid dreams. But then, I dreamt one of my rare dreams in colour. War. Streets in grey and muted colours of green, the military sort. People fleeing, aimlessly. Military tanks. Young boy warriors kicking about street signs in a sick game of football. Complete anarchy. A sense of panic because in the mass movement I lost my daughter and husband. And a sense of relief as I went back into the church from where I was trying to flee and find them both. Complete clarity and fully coloured vision as I evaluated the situation: we were stranded for an indefinite period of time, with little food and no means of transportation in an unsafe place. But the sense of relief prevailed as I knew that with my loved ones near me I would find the strength to face these things.
Woke up again wondering what the dream meant. I had vivid dreams before, one in which I was trapped in a tight space the night before a big earthquake in Turkey in which many people were buried alive. I thought then that maybe this is my opportunity to pray. For a family somewhere in the world facing war today. A little family which will find strength to fight what’s ahead of them by being together. I hardly feel like a warrior challenging the enemy to war. But I guess I don’t have to feel it, I just AM. He said so!
Image courtesy of Boston.com.